Archive for January, 2010

final fantasy xiii (**)

Posted on January 27th, 2010

HILARIOUS ALT TEXT a review of
final fantasy xiii
a videogame developed and published by square-enix
for the sony playstation 3 computer entertainment system
text by tim rogers
score: (out of four)

Bottom line: Final Fantasy XIII is “often as exciting as finding an email from a real human being in your spam folder”.

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final fantasy xiii (**) (short version)

Posted on January 27th, 2010

HILARIOUS ALT TEXT a review of
final fantasy xiii
a videogame developed and published by square-enix
for the sony playstation 3 computer entertainment system
text by tim rogers
score: (out of four)

Bottom line: Final Fantasy XIII is “often as exciting as finding an email from a real human being in your spam folder”.

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Brütal Legend (****)

Posted on January 11th, 2010

Yes. a review of
Brütal Legend
a videogame developed by Double Fine Productions
and published by Electronic Arts
text by Samuel Kite
score: (out of four)

Bottom line: Brütal Legend is a “story to be told over mead in some hall while you await the day to wage perpetual war on life”.

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Assassin’s Creed (***)

Posted on January 11th, 2010

Kill murder stab death kill rape stab slash cut bleed kill stab murder kill. a review of
Assassin’s Creed
a videogame developed by Ubisoft Montreal
and published by Ubisoft
text by Samuel Kite
score: (out of four)

Bottom line: Assassin’s Creed is repeating a moderate thrill”.
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Left 4 Dead (***1/2)

Posted on January 11th, 2010

Ohhhhhh.... I get it... four. Like. For. Like. It's a joke. a review of
Left 4 Dead
a videogame developed by Valve
and published by Publisher
text by Samuel Kite
score: 1/2 (out of four)

Bottom line: Left 4 Dead is “just … a really great time”.


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